Stuff We’re Tired of Repeating

🛍️ “How long does shipping take?”

Depends. But generally:

US: 3-6 business days

Canada: 3-6 business days

Other places: It’ll get there. Eventually.

Please don’t email us 3 days after ordering. We’re still emotionally preparing your package.


📦 “Can I return my order?”

Only if you read our return policy first and still feel strongly about it.

Unworn, unwashed, non-traumatized items only

You cover return shipping — we cover emotional damage


🧼 “How do I wash this?”

Cold water. Inside out. No bleach.
Or throw it in and pray. We won’t judge.


💳 “Do you accept refunds?”

If it’s our fault? Yes.
If it’s buyer’s remorse? That sounds like a you problem.


😑 “Why is it called ‘Not a Meme Brand’ if it’s clearly a meme brand?”

Because branding is a scam and irony is all we have left.


🫠 “Can I cancel my order?”

If we haven’t started printing it, sure.
If it’s already being made — it's on its way to haunt your closet.


🤖 “Is this a real brand?”

Define real.
We exist. You’re reading this. That’s enough existential proof for us.